Friday, February 1, 2008

January Videos - Updated

January was a tough month for movies. I am not sure what led to this, but a couple Tuesdays I got the stifled snort from the Blockbuster guy when I threw a couple DVDs down on the counter, but seriously, eff him! They're free - Total Access, bitch!

The King of Kong: A Fistfull of Quarters - I may have jumped the gun when picking the January DVDs before January was over. The last Tuesday brought this pleasant surprise. You will laugh, you might cry, but you will definitely want to punch Steve Sanders and Billy Mitchell. There are some amazing characters (Mr. Awesome) and the film stops short of being a school yard geek pounding and shows some respect (restraint) in their portrayal of the passion of the nerd. It's short, it's fun, but most importantly, it's hip and it's indie-cine, so you really can't afford to remain in the dark on this one, can you?

3:10 to Yuma
. Maybe this one is a bit obvious. I mean, after all,
that Christian Bale is so hot right now. Let me tell you, Russell Crowe is no slouch either. Don't count on a nonstop shootout (The Quick and the Dead this is not...). But there is enough going on that you won't be bored. Throw in some stunning vistas and and the super creepy performance by Ben Foster (he may have creeped you previously as Russell in 6 Feet Under or as strung out Jake in Alpha Dog) and you have a for sure winner.

Shoot Em Up. Ever wondered what would happen if a bunch of stoner video g
ame makers got their hands on a room full of monkeys with typewriters, a kilo of blow and a Hollywood budget? My thoughts exactly: 86 minutes of awesome-ness. Somehow they got Clive Owen, Paul Giamatti and the oh-so-sexy lactating hooker Monica Bellucci to sign on and I am pretty sure they all made it up as they went. Almost every line is chortle-out-loud funny and Owen's carrot obsessed sharp shooting appears to be the only unifying plot line, but really, what else do you need? I WILL watch this again.

Sunshine. This may be a stretch for some of you. It is, in fact, a deep space sci-fi thriller. There are two kind of people in this world: Nerds and Anti-Fantites. For better or worse, I'm a Nerd so roll with me on this one. For the most part, like being left handed, you are clearly one or the other.
Directed by Danny Boyle (28 days Later), this one puts you on edge from the beginning. Shit has gone seriously wrong. The Sun (and by association, the Earth) is dying. 8 good folks strap themselves to (literally) the worlds larges nuclear bomb (that's NUU-CLEE-ehr) and try to jumpstart the sun.
Again we find Boyle teamed with Cillian Murphy, who is great, but who also automatically sets me on edge. He's weird and is always somewhat crazy (or completely crazy in Batman Begins). Combine that with a deep tension and a pervasive fear of the unknown and imminent death, and it's got you on the edge of your seat. And that's the first 8 minutes. Things build to an insane crescendo showcasing the best of Boyle and his refusal to be confined to a conventional or predictable style of film making.

And the winner for the WORST DVD of the month goes to: Death Sentence. Granted, I do have some long-standing anger toward Kevin Bacon. He ruined one of my favorite movies in high school - Wild Things. Oh baby, how I love you Denise
Richards. But why, oh why, did they decide to wipe out all of the sexy swimming pool makeouts dancing merrily in my head with a protracted, full frontal shot of Kevin Bacon?
But back to Death Sentence. As the movie builds toward its third and final climax, Kevin Bacon goes loony. In the hospital, he decides it's "really" time for revenge. And this time, it's serious. He indicates his ferocity with the slowest eye-narrowing-while-turning-to-face-the-camera shot I have ever seen. I am pretty sure that James Wan was channeling a certain Youtube Clip when providing the direction here... (Thanks CLOVE).
So, do yourself a favor, skip this one and save yourself [insert punny reference to a "death sentence" here].

4 comments:

Jenna said...

i like this blog very much.
here's one for you guys: the man who beat the king last night in australia is also funny! who knew. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8y2ORlHxIL8&feature=related

Shandon said...

Death Sentence saved us in 6 degrees to Kevin Bacon last night. They wouldn't give me the Coachella tickets, but I won pride.

Jenna said...

the sequel to I Am Legend

http://www.apple.com/trailers/sony_pictures/hancock/large.html

WHITE CHOCOLATE said...

FIST FULL OF QUARTERS ROCKED! AND I STILL WANT TO PUNCH BILLY MITCHELL RIGHT IN THE BABY MAKER!