Sunday, February 17, 2008

This Beer Tastes Like Nu Shooz

If you've ever had a new pair of sneakers, fresh out of the box, you know that smell. You love that smell. Its "new shoes" and I think its actually built into the cost of those $100 Nikes.

I love the smell of new shoes. If there were an air freshener shaped like an Air Jordan, it'd be a top seller. At one point in my youth I remember actually purchasing a spray at Foot Locker that smelled like new shoes. Supposedly, it was for use on shoes to keep them minty fresh. However, it ended up sprayed on the tree hanging from my rear-view mirror, my locker room, and even my torso. In ninth grade I remember coming out after a track meet and my buddy wondering/exclaiming, "something smells like new shoes." Someone smelled like new shoes.

Along with baking bread, that cooler at the grocery store that holds all the flowers and a fresh mowed lawn, for me, new shoes was one of life's great aromatic wonders. Until last night, when I tasted that smell for the first time.

I purchased a 6-pack of Peroni, on sale at $6.99 on the corner mart last night halfway through my buddies 27th birthday party and C-List Celebrity themed extravaganza. Beer bought, cap popped and upon the first swig, there was that smell, in the form of a flavor! I was drinking new shoes! Immediately, I passed around the green bottle and it was agreed: Peroni tastes like New Shoes. But, the stark realization soon crossed my mind. The smell I so longed after in my youth is, in reality, nothing more than a skunky, out of balance, thin and grainy beer. That new shoes smell is Peroni Nastro Azzurro. New Shoes, ruined forever.

Out of nowhere, I hear a friend from Portland exclaim, "I just loved that band Nu Shooz, much better than this beer." Nu Shooz, like Quarterflash were one hit mega wonders from Portland, OR in the 80's, known for their hit I Can't Wait. You may not remember the husband and wife dance music duo but you'll surely remember the song and probably their epic video. Whoever would have thought that the smell of those Air Max 95s, a revered Italian beer and an 80's classic from my hometown would forever inauspiciously be linked.


thecharles said...


Mr Hands 2 said...

haha. just opened a peroni leggera (light peroni) and was just about to write a post but u beat me to it. yours would have been better anyway haha :P...

thing is... it's only when you first open it yeah? i'm a third through it and it's not there anymore :(