Road Trip

It would be irresponsible not to mention the extended QLE vacation, so first, my apologies Deeks, I know you've missed us.

But, you have to figure it was only a matter of time before we wrote something about gas prices. I mean yes, I understand that on a global scale, we are still getting some relatively cheap fuel - but that doesn't make it any easier to come to grips with it! I remember driving 20 minutes each way simply to find gas for under $1.00 - and this wasn't THAT long ago!

I digress, the point here is not to get political or tell more sob stories about high gas prices, but rather to mourn the eventual passing of an American rite of passage: the pointless road trip. Driving hundreds or thousands or miles in vehicles with less than stellar fuel economy - mostly with the point of just doing it!

One college spring break we drove about 3,000 miles on a bumbling odyssey that saw us having freak outs in Reno, almost freezing to death on the Wyoming plains, getting hopelessly lost in Arches and breaking down twice. It was the best...

So what brings all this up? Check out these yahoos from Utah who decided to set the unofficial world record on the fastest to drive to all lower 48 states. Despite being a little goofy (see: use of a Scion, quoting "On The Road" - a bit obvious don't you think - and the pure insanity of spending 106 hours in a car) you've got to respect the idea and just getting out there. Life's a journey, right?

UPDATE: Gotten some good road trip stories. Add yours in the comments section! Here's one from Deeks.

One random Wednesday night around 9-10 pm, my roommates in college were being lame and said they were not going to go out during the upcoming w/e. I asked what it would take to get them to change their minds ... they said drive to Vegas and bring us back a few of the famous 99-cent foot long hot dogs from the "slots-of-fun" casino. So ... I did. 7 hours later I was back in LA with hot dogs for each of them. Best road trip of my life. Oh by the way ... they still wouldn't go out that week-end ... NERDS!!!

A Great Day in American History

Today marks the 75th anniversary of the modification of the Volstead Act. Prohibition officially ended on December 5th, 1933 with the ratification of the 21st amendment. However, 75 years ago today on April 7th, 1933, President FDR ended a national ban on alcohol - one of his great campaign promises.

Congress modified the Volstead Act, allowing sale of 3.2% alcoholic beer, prior to the 21st amendment.  Newly legalized beer was sent to the White House and a toast was done to acknowledge the beginning of the end of prohibition. 

In honor of FDR and this monumental day in the history of this country, take time this evening to raise a cold one during dinner and toast "cheers to beer."

Instead, Save the Time, Money, Paper and Effort.

Get a load of this card from randoms Jeff and Kara. Congratulations! You are the first image that pops up when "Save The Date" is typed and searched into Google Images. With all due respect to love, devotion and commitment, can't we all agree on a little laugh at the expense of Siegfried's little brother and the card he OK'd to send out to friends and family? There, didn't that feel good.

With all the recent and impending engagements and weddings, I wanted to get a quick rant off my chest. In regard to the Save The Date (STD) card, please consider conserving energy and forgoing the unnecessary hassle.

Isn't this the email age when someone can send out an email with all the pertinent information. Don't we all get Evites? Americangreetings.com, Ourweddingday.com and, yes, Evite.com all offer STD e-cards. All you just need to be able to deal with is the Burt Baccarat playing over the websites.

How about a phone call spreading the good news to the over 40-Year-Old crowd and an SMS to your buddies.

What really bugs me about these STD is that I already have these dates on my calendar. If I'm going to the wedding, I more than likely know the persons involved and have talked to one, if not both of the parties about their engagement. Upon so doing, the date of the ceremony comes up in conversation and is promptly placed in my Outlook.

Specifically, if I am IN your wedding, I have obviously already S'd The D and do not need a reminder. I may have broken my wrist in my mid 20's riding a Tonka Toy build for a 4-Year-Old down the steepest street in Northern California, but I'm not an idiot. I can remember dates.

The most concerning issue of the STD is that it basically says "Hey! Get ready because we're going to send you another card that tells you the same info, about the same event that you are already planning on attending. " That is just 100% asinine.

Can't we at least just merge the two cards in harmony, like the synergy between the affianced? In so doing, we can really save a little bit of what dignity and fortitude we have left.

Save The Time: Has anyone seen how elaborate these things are? My roommate just got one that was encased within two envelopes, each sealed shut, with their own respective bows. Two hundred STD were sent out for this wedding. That must be at least 5 hours of your life just to get those things mail ready. Oh, the card was from his brother. My roommate's the best man, booked his ticket months ago and has the time off work. I don't think he really needed that card.

Save The Money: At roughly $2.00-$3.00 on average per card, isn't their something you'd rather use your, or your parents, hard-earned money on?

Save the Effort: With all the options out there, I know that it is at least one full day and probably 4 significant arguments over ribbon or font size that can and should be avoided.

Save The Paper: Seriously, these things are not made on environmentally friendly 100% post-consumer recycled virgin wood fiber. Save a tree, not the date. And if you must mail me an STD, drop me a note in the form of a postcard.

Flying Sucks

OK, maybe that is a bit cranks of me, but I did just sit on the tarmac at JFK for an extra 1.5 hours after they delayed us an hour - all this before a 5.5 hour flight across the country.

Then, inevitably you get on and have a seat mate that is making a slow but insistent hostile takeover of your legroom, and staked his claim on the armrest before you even sat down.

Now for some people, the sound of a jet engine is soporific - they fire it up, you pass out. Some people (the guy sitting next to me last night) have either a fascinating inner monologue or an amazing capacity to stave off boredom (he watched TBS for a solid 7 hours on the seat back TV - with no sound.

Me? I have to come up with other ways to cope with the experience flying has become and I thought I would share a couple tips.

Make sure you have the right seat: Although you can't predict the BMI of the person sitting next to you, you can at least give yourself a fair shot at comfort. The site Seat Guru has it all - down to what kind of foot room, what kind of entertainment, etc. I check it every time I pick a seat. Also - check the airlines website about 72 hours and 24 hours before your flight. Some airlines release "premium" seats including exit rows, bulkheads and the front of the plane.

Noise canceling headphones. They can be spendy - between $100 and $350 - but they are worth it. You will feel less tired, less deaf and more relaxed when you block out a lot of the noise and create your own space to either listen to your iPod or watch a movie without having to crank it up to hear anything. They are also larger and more imposing than the traditional iBuds so you will have a better chance of looking like you can not talk to your neighbor. Honestly, I don't care what you sell, and yes, I am aware of the big dumb loudmouth behind us, but would rather block her out with my headphones than discussing her with you.

Fly direct and don't fly red eye. This may seem like a no brainer, but my dumbass just flew a red eye this week. You may save $50 or $100, but you will also feel like hell, be less comfortable during the traveling part and feel worse once you get there. What's the point of getting there 6 hours earlier on the red eye if all you want to do is sleep for a solid 6 hours once you get there?

First single off new Flight of the Conchords album

If you are unlike me, and find the Flight of the Conchords music funny and ironic, here is the first single off of their new, self-titled album - 'Ladies of the World'.

Enjoy.

JUSTICE - SF Concourse

Let me begin by saying that I have been advocating for Justice the last 12-14 months. I am on board w/ their sound and I like their studio album. I am also OK with the "rejected" Fabric mix from January '08 that was borderline over-indulgent on disco-glam.

I have seen Justice perform on three occasions. 1. Coachella '07. 2. Mezzanine in SF last October. 3. Last Thursday at the Concourse in SF. Deterioration is evident.

The Coachella show was great and the Mezzanine was one of, if not the most fun, engaging and sound-bastic shows I have ever seen. Ninety minutes of straight mixing and good, continuous music. It was a fluid, true DJ set.

Expectations and anticipation were high for the event last Thursday. Some notes from the show:

1. They have seemingly completely abandoned the typical DJ set in favor of a more rock and roll based set. They played songs, kind of, that lasted 4-5 minutes. 3 minutes would be a build up, of sorts, to the crescendo, which was almost always underwhelming. It probably would've been better had they just played their album straight through. And that's not a good thing to report.

2. The first serious bass-drop was 45 minutes into the show. Not OK.

3. Stopping the music every 5 minutes, raising your arms in victory and urging the crowd to applaud your splendor does not make for a good dance program. That is what happens at rock concert.

4. Speaking of rock concert, the encore was basically an undancable speed metal Rob Zombie guitar riff showcased by bass hits and 8-bit video game noises. It was tailor made for the Guitar Hero III fans in the crowd and it was not the way to end a set. But, it was totally unique and I've got to give them credit for this as it was unlike anything I'd ever seen. Even though I didn't care for it.

5. I felt like the oldest kid in the house. I've never been to an event where they were more 18-21 year old strung-out, neon-clad, spandex wearing, mustache donning H-Ds in my life. Justice is now evidently "cool," which makes me consider this possibly being my last show of theirs, if only for the fact that the concert etiquette from this younger American Apparel supporting crowd was absolutely horrible, if not borderline rude.

6. The venue was raining sweat. Literally. Condensation built up from the audience to the ceiling and then dripped profusely like the jungles of Amazon.

7. If you watch the video you can see all the things that were annoying about the show: lack of drops, the sign-a-longs, stopping songs for applause and mindless buildup culminating with less then stellar and way too short reward. Everyone wants the reward and it was just something Justice used to do, but have abandoned in their recent show.

However, you can also see that the crowd was going ape-shit. Which makes me wonder if my expectations are you high? Am I totally jaded? Maybe, I Am just a snob? Should I stop over-analyzing things? Or, maybe I didn't have enough to drink....

With all that said, there were some interesting and redeeming qualities about the event. However, I think my days of paying to see Justice are now over, even though their draw and legacy are seemingly only just taking off.

JUSTICE

The killer concert is in the eye and ear of the beholder, so we thought it would be fun to write two reviews of the JUSTICE Myspace tour - both the SF and the PDX shows.

JUSTICE's stop in Portland is the Roseland Theater. Located downtown with capacity of 1,400 - Roseland gets the slightly more recognized acts - usually on their second pass through town. So, you get people who know the hit song or are going on recommendation of a friend - and this group always creates an interesting dynamic with the "original" and hardcore fans.

For JUSTICE, the die hards are, of course, mega-hipster-doofuses. Mostly 20 and younger, these fanboys and girls were endowed with the power of the spirit - much like the middle American mega church revival crowd the glowing cross called to mind.

The other crowd could best be described as meat heads. I swear I watched an entire baseball team walk in. Everyone wearing (nonironic) tees, baggy(!) jeans and wearing hats that weren't even meant to make a point beyond their allegiance to a sports team. Weird. I owe their presence mostly to the Mos Def and Spank Rock remix of DANCE floating around on the web.

I understand the necessity of all ages clubs. I know up and coming H-D's want to see the shows, but it really does completely ruin the experience to have id checking, security lines and strict segregation. At the Roseland for example, the 21+ crowd is packed on to the balcony - forced to choose between a powerful thirst and the full music experience.

Despite all that the crowd was hyped, ready to move and about to bring the place down by the time the Augé and de Rosnay walked on stage. When the drop hit, well over 1,000 people jumped into a fist pumping frenzy. Illuminated by a glowing cross, insane crossed up strobes, LED amps and glowing speakers - in a word; shit got crazy.

There were some phenomenal moments in the show and some masterfully timed sound, light and effect touches. The boys know what they are doing, although often find themselves more interested in proving their intricate technical prowess than necessarily delivering what the people want.

Many of their set ups were strong: building beats, smashing rhythms and a delicious tease of samples from their biggest hits. But, frequently, as a result of ADD or a powerful desire to show off their cuts, the payoff didn't come.

A note to artists: no matter how much we like your music, we do not want an acoustic version with us singing your biggest hit, it's just not as cool as you think it is. We paid to see YOU.

Even when they decided to let the crowd revel in that dirty pleasure of just rocking out to a hit single (you know you like it) they still seemed to admonish that desire, such as significantly lengthening the builds and shortening the hooks on DVNO. JUSTICE is, if nothing else, a couple of kids with some great chops but an even greater ear: intensely pleasurable melodies and catchy hooks are your game, so let them play!

The overall flow was good, although they couldn't help indulging themselves in repeated samples of the same disco era cuts - one of which I counted four times through the evening. Despite distractions, the show, the beats and the lights (irrational fears of epileptic fits haunted me throughout the evening) built to quite a crescendo as the encores approached. I will leave a full description of them to those who still have the show to attend, but plan to rock the hell out.

JUSTICE put on a great show, played the audience and its energy well and even indulged in theatrics such as hand-holding and bowing, crowd surfing, smoking at the boards and numerous encores. Despite that, I never felt any real connection to the people on stage. Part of seeing a live performance is an insight into the bands you love - getting to know them on a different level, and to a large degree, feeding off their energy and their performance. Hidden behind insane light displays and mostly head down hard at work on the task at hand - the energy of the "band" just wasn't there to carry the music.

Overall I would say the show is good with some elements of greatness. The Myspace aspect was weird but not terribly distracting. The power of the spectacle and the energy of the crowd carried the night. As an "adult" who occasionally allows themselves to get down, head out on a school night and get down and just plain groove to some wild electronic DJs, I hope next time the group is willing to indulge me, give in to my hedonism and let its fans revel in all the best of their music (even if it is a top 40 hit)...

Life's Unwritten Rules v. 1.0

Rule #1: For a successful relationship you must... Be on the same cell phone carrier.

OK, I guess this will officially make them written rules, but that is neither here nor there. And really, it's probable no one has written these down for good reason (they are inane) but what the hell?

First on the list, one that is near and dear to my heart: cell phone politics. I am happy to say that the majority of my friends and family are "IN" on Verizon's Network. I do not have any particular love for Verizon, but somehow the people who populate my life have all gravitated to the big red V. That alone is a great reason to stay - unlimited communications with those who matter.

Inevitably, things will draw you away from your cell phone network. The biggest reason: new parties to your love life. I'll admit it, I have gone to Verizon's website to check if someone was "IN" as part of the "suitability for dating" checklist. After all, a successful relationship is built on communication, and if you can not communicate in an unlimited manner, surely problems will arise, will they not?

But what of those you leave behind? Family, friends, late night dirty texting buddies, all, no longer a part of your unlimited calling, texting and picture plan. You argue "Hey, my iPhone plan is unlimited, I'll still be in touch." But the magic is gone, that connection is broken. It just isn't the same.

Of course, there are other reasons to leave your network. New job pays for your phone, time for a change and, the big one, the iPhone... I mean who doesn't feel like they NEED to be able to go to ESPN.com while sitting at the Blazers game (I saw it), upload mobile Facebook pictures or have instant access to their Gmail at all times and places.

In the end, though, beware the statement you make by paying that broken contract fee and sacrificing your long term commitment to your network. Who knows if things work out with this hot new item or new career path, you may find yourself on a network all your own...

Dancing Animals vs. Dancing People Dressed as Animals

Which do you prefer. The dancing seal or the dancing mascots?

Ok, so that was pretty impressive, but what about this footage below. Given the choice, I think I'd be the shark. I like his style.

BYOBW 2008 - Adults Riding Kids Toys = Awesome

It has been said that, among other things, San Francisco is know for its unique and extravagant events, happenings and gatherings. 

Its OK to tie yourself and four of your friends to a shopping cart carrying a keg and run (fall) down the streets of North Beach in the Urban Iditarod. In San Francisco it is also cool, if it is your thing, to suck the cock of your buddy who is wearing nothing but a garter belt and ass-less chaps at high noon during the Dorey "Up Your Alley" Street Fair. 

If it strikes your fancy, its more than encouraged to go on a 16 hour E tab induced dance-a-thon trance session down Market street and in front of City Hall during the Love Parade in October. 

If you are the type of person that likes beer at 6:00AM on a Sunday Morning, the city shuts down the better half SF proper for you to "run" through downtown with 100,000+ of your friends in costume during Bay to Breakers. 

The list goes on and on, but the best and more pure showcase of fun and community may just be at the annual Bring Your Own Big Wheel (BYOBW) race.

The premise is really quite simple. You show up with an old Big Wheel, the classic red one with yellow tire works, or really any variation thereof is acceptable.  As everything in town, you dress up in some sort of Bizzaro (read: throw some shit together at the last minute) attire or garb. You bring some friends and a beer or two and get in line at the top of a ridiculously steep, windy and treacherous hill. Then you push off and careen toward the finish amid the cheers of the estimated 8,000 spectators and the ohs and ahs when that second turn sends you flailing into the guy that getting too close to the action. 

The race this year was moved from Lombard Street (you know, the picturesque, manicured shrub lined tourist trap) to the more precarious and even more curvy Vermont street hill in the Portrero (middle of nowhere) district. New location, but more people. The best part about this event, besides reliving my glory days on Bennington Drive when I'd race Eli Zackheim to defeat on a daily basis, was the fact that is truly was a family and community orientated event. 

People were behaved and in control. Everyone was smiling and in jovial disposition. Families brought their kids and parents raced along side their sons and daughters next to that hipster doofus from the Mission and that ad exec from the Marina.

All in all a spectacle to behold and embrace. And a second place finish in heat #2 by your's truly. Check out the video montage that some guy w/ too much time on his hands put together.